The ‘Yours Sincerely’ Debacle

Fri, Jun 25, 2010

I have decided to take a different slant on the blog from here on. I have gained some business acumen and have made some amazing discoveries about myself as well, so it makes sense to reflect that in my writing.

When I first started HowCoachesGrow.com, I went on the advice of someone who had his own idea of how to do business online. I’m not saying his advice was wrong. It simply didn’t resonate with me. At the time, I didn’t know any better so I did what I was told. But something didn’t feel right.

I didn’t know enough about business at the time to understand how pandering to my bad feeling could translate into a successful business enterprise so I ignored it. However after falling flat on my face a few times I wondered if there was a part of me that actually did know better.

I wondered what would happen if I dismissed what I knew and did things my own way. Could I still build a flourishing business? It was a scary notion to consider. To forget the ‘rules’ of online business, forget what everyone else was doing and how they were generating business, and do my own thing was a big (and scary) leap.

But I had to try because my only other option other than continue to be fake and fail was to go work for the man again and that was akin to locking myself up for life.

I am naturally a nurturing person and I can be a bit crazy. My sense of humour is left of field and I speak my heart out loud. A lot of my traits may be considered unsuitable for the business world so I used to hide them beneath my professional persona. It felt fake and uncomfortable and I knew I couldn’t maintain the façade long-term.

We all play roles – husband, wife, son, daughter, student, teacher, child, adult etc. Business is no different. We put on our ‘professional’ hat and off we go to do business. Maybe I bought the wrong size or style of hat but mine never seemed to fit properly.

So I took off my ‘professional’ hat and made business personal. And guess what? It worked! I now connect with my clients on a ‘real’ level. There are no padlocked cages around our business and personal personas but rather a merging of the two into relationships that are still professional (there’s still work to do!) but also friendly and sincere. In some cases I have found commonalities beyond the bounds of the work that lie between me and my clients. I have discovered friendships and shared life experiences. I have discovered that the way to really connect with people is to honestly connect with them.

Perhaps doing business the ‘professional’ way is leftovers from the Victorian age. Perhaps it is obsolete. Perhaps in this age of cynicism where people will go to any lengths to make a sale keeping it real is the only way to succeed.

I love my work and I am passionate about seeing coaches connect with clients who need them. Where passion is involved, so is the heart. Passion doesn’t come from thinking things out and planning the best approach. All that stuff is necessary but it is the intention behind the actions that make all the difference.

Which brings me to the point of this post. My experiences have taught me that there is a crucial ingredient to success in business that has nothing to do with the technicalities of getting the work done properly and everything to do with doing business with clear intentions and plenty of integrity: sincerity.

According to reference.com sincerity is ‘the virtue of one who speaks truly about his or her own feelings, thoughts, desires.’

When it comes to building a solid online coaching business I define sincerity as this:

‘Sincerity is honesty of mind and intention; freedom from hypocrisy, disguise, imitation or false pretence; refusal to misinform, to falsely influence or persuade to generate wealth or admiration.’

I don’t know about you, but I would prefer to be a person of sincerity in business rather than someone who is false or pretentious… no matter what the outcome.

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